What if God Does Not Provide?

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One of my favorite infertility bloggers, A Sweet Aroma, graciously allowed me to re-blog one of her posts.  I was scrolling through her posts and this one stood out to me.  It truly encompasses so much of what this journey is like and I for one needed (and still need!) that faith booster.

Thank you, Brandy, for sharing your blog post!!

What If God Doesnt Provide TTC

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Husband and I were on the last leg of our trip to San Diego.
It was a late evening flight on the Eve of Thanksgiving.
Most of the cabin (including Joel) was asleep.
I couldn’t seem to quiet my brain to join them so I pulled out my Bible, journal, and devotion.
The first real bit of peace and quiet I’d had all day.

I was a day behind on my Thanksgiving series so I decided to play catch up….
Interestingly enough the 2 days were “Give Thanks in Plenty” and “Give Thanks in Want.”
Just that morning I had shared my few day old letter to the Two Week Wait.
I knew that during our time with Joel’s family we would know one way or the other….
Was my womb filled with plenty or filled with want?

The perspective from the devotion left me in tears.
The moment held such chilling intimacy that’s not predicted on a plane packed with passengers.
As the tears faded and my eyes grew tired, I turned on my music, laid over on the window
and hoped to get some rest.
I dozed off while dreaming of having good news to share with our California family.

But that dream was short lived… even shorter than I expected.

I woke up on Thursday, Thanksgiving Day, to find out that my womb was filled with want.
My baby-home was still empty and next summer would not hold a child for me to hold.

Visit A Sweet Aroma to read the rest of her wonderful post.31 Days ttc infertility

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4 thoughts on “What if God Does Not Provide?

  1. Pingback: 31 Days of TTC Recap | Life with You

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