New Mommy Lesson

1 Comment

You know what’s amazing about being a Mom?  Well…one of the many things that are amazing about being a Mom?  I’ve been blown away by the things that I am learning about God.

During times when the Wingman has been screaming, I’ve said things like, “Don’t you know Mommy loves you?  Don’t you know I’m here?”  Or of course just the reassurances of “I’m here.  I’ve got you.  You’re okay.”  Or the time when we were driving when it was a feeding time and I kept reassuring the screaming Wingman that I would feed him just as soon as we found a place to pull over.  Then when we did, I said, “Mommy would never let her little boy starve.”

Sometimes when I talk to the Wingman, I’ll be stunned as I realize the spiritual correlations.  The love that I have for him is only a minuscule amount compared to the great love that God has toward me.  I’ll be honest here…God’s love for me has been something that I have struggled with.  But when I think about how the parent/child relationship reflects God’s relationship with His children….I am stunned.

Matthew 7:11, “If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!”

How could I doubt God’s love? How could I doubt His provision?  If I, being an inexperienced and sinful creature, have this much love and care for my son….the ramifications of God’s greater, perfect love are huge.

Or what about the times where I have said, “Trust Mommy.”  “I’m putting you down for a few minutes so that I can get my Moby on….you don’t need to scream as if I’ll never hold you again.”  “I’ve never let you starve before…I won’t start now.”  “Mommy’s right here…you’re not alone.”  How often do I act toward God the same way the Wingman does to me?  I forget God’s provision in the past…my eyes are so quick to look only in the moment that I forget that God can see the bigger picture and is in perfect control.

I love my baby so much.  I don’t want to see him sad, scared, or lonely.  So often I forget that, just as I am always here for my sweet boy, God is always here and available and desiring me to run to Him.

I love those times where as soon as words are out of my mouth to my son, I am literally in awe of God.  I love learning about Him while being a Mom!

-Bonnie

July to September Reading

1 Comment

Well, I haven’t done as much reading recently…what with the Wingman’s birth and family in town for several weeks…and figuring out our routine with a newborn…..but I’m glad I was able to get a few books in!  🙂

Fiction:

  1. Mr. Popper’s Penguins by Richard and Florence Atwater
  2. Dark Road Home by Elizabeth Ludwig (review posted here)

Nonfiction:

  1. Crazy Love by Francis Chan
  2. Husband Project, The by Kathi Lipp
  3. Praying Through Your Pregnancy by Jennifer Polimino and Carolyn Warren

Audio Books: (LibriVox recordings)

  1. Agnes Gray by Anne Bronte

-Bonnie

Book Review: Dark Road Home

Leave a comment

When I saw that the sequel to No Safe Harbor was available to review, I was excited!  So fun to get the chance to read and review a series…for free!

To be honest, I liked the sequel better than the first book.  Dark Road Home, by Elizabeth Ludwig, is the second book in the Edge of Freedom series.  It is the story of the brother of Cara Hamilton (protagonist in the first one), who is determined to rejoin the Fenians.  During his attempts to regain the trust of that brotherhood, he meets Ana, the shy woman who was trying to forget her past.

This book is a good mix of history, suspense, and romance.  I thoroughly enjoyed the mystery and was curious to see how the book played out.  Both Eoghan and Ana find their way back to God through the various events and the help of the Catholic church.   It is a good story of overcoming painful memories, forgiving long held grudges, and learning to trust God again.

Note: I received this book for free from Bethany House Publishers in exchange for this review.

-Bonnie

Update!

2 Comments

Well…I have been a Mommy for almost 9 weeks now.  Being a Mom is already the craziest, most wonderful, most harrowing, most rewarding thing I’ve ever done.  Only a few weeks into the Wingman’s life, I told my husband, “THIS is why we celebrate Mother’s Day….if for no other reason, it’s because of the first few weeks of life.”   🙂

I remember the day when I was looking down at our little son and I knew that I had found my calling.  This is where God wants me to be.  And I wouldn’t have it any other way!

There’s nothing like looking into your son’s eyes and having him look back up at you.  There’s nothing like the first time he smiles and it completely melts your heart, giving you butterflies and bringing tears to your eyes.  There’s nothing like hearing him giggle for the first time.  There’s nothing like watching the love of your life hold your son and pretend to wrestle with him.  There’s nothing like sitting next to him and having him just look at you until he slowly falls asleep, peeking every now and then as if to make sure you’re still there.  There’s nothing like little baby cuddles.  There’s nothing like listening to him “talk” to you.

I’m not biased…at all….but he is just the cutest little boy ever!!!

2013-08-30 12.15.03

2013-08-30 12.14.56Hopefully now that we have learned somewhat of a routine I can resume blogging!  🙂

-Bonnie

From Around Blog Land

1 Comment

Respecting My Children – My sister talks about being in the world of your children.  (Also….that adorable little girl is my niece.  Is she not ADORABLE??)

10 Disciplines for a Meaningful Marriage

Why They (kids/husband/housework) Get On My Nerves – Do you really have something more important to do?

37 Conversation Rules for Gentlemen from 1875 – Where did this common decency go?  (Applicable for men and women!)

The Problem with Sexual Compatibility 

A Cat Responds to his Human Returning After 6 Months – This made me laugh.  A lot.

My Husband is Not my Soul Mate – Is it possible God may not have a spouse for you?  Or that there may not be “The One” for you?

I Wonder if Sunday School is Destroying Our Kids – Getting back to the gospel.  It’s not about trying to be good like the people in the Bible.

-Bonnie

Date Night Apps

Leave a comment

My love and I love going on dates.  We’ve had lots of different kinds of dates…at home dates, eating out dates, seeing a movie at the theater, going on walks, etc.  But some of our dates are more spur of the moment.  Those are our Android App dates.  😉

We don’t always plan these dates.  Sometimes they just happen.  But we have lots of fun playing games on our phones together!  Here are some of the ones we have enjoyed!

1. Angry Birds.  Obviously.  I think almost everyone with a smart phone has played Angry Birds.

2. Hill Climber.  Drive a car.  Collect coins.  Don’t run out of gas.  And don’t crash/tip over/otherwise die.

3. Draw Something.  Basically Pictionary.  Send a picture to the other person and they have to guess what it is.

4. Can You Escape the Room?  Find the way out of a room by clicking around the screen.  Memorize sequences, pick up items that will aid in the escape, etc until you can exit.  (Similar one is 100 Doors.)

5. And our latest one is Shooting Showdown.  Practice various kinds of shooting games (plates, tires, trucks, etc) and then compete with another player.  Unfortunately, the competitions match you against a random player…you can’t pick a player to compete against.  But we just have our own competitions to see who can get the highest score in the practice sessions.

Do you have any date apps?  🙂

-Bonnie

The Wingman’s Birth Story

5 Comments

Here is the birth story of our precious son. He was born on July 21st after a 19 hour labor. I know this is a very long version…but trust me, this is the edited down version. 😉 It was absolutely an amazing experience and I am so thankful for all that God did!

Visit Beauty Through Imperfection for more birth stories!

On Saturday, July 20th, at 6:30 in the morning I became aware while half asleep of some pain. Around 7:30 I became fully awake and realized that I had been having a lot of these pains. Were they possibly contractions? I woke up my husband to explain and told him I wasn’t sure if they were really contractions.

After taking a hot shower and still having the pains, The Pilot, my Mom and I all agreed that it looked like the beginning of labor. (Praise #1 – Going into labor on the weekend while my husband was at home!)

From the get go, they were pretty much between 5 and 8 minutes apart. That timing lasted pretty much the whole day.

During early labor, my husband was able to mow the lawn (a project that he’d been trying to do for 2 weeks). By the time he was almost done though I was ready for him to be with me again. It was definitely painful and uncomfortable and I wanted him close by. I spent quite a while lying down, alternating some on my sides. We tried a couple contractions lying on my back to see how far along I was by measuring the distance between my breast bone and the top of my uterus. The contractions were more painful on my back, so we only did that twice.

At first when I had a contraction, my Mom or the Pilot would gently rub my belly or my legs and it was very soothing. But I quickly reached a point where I didn’t want to be touched during contractions. I also wanted it quiet…no talking! I tried to really be conscious of my voice and tone…I didn’t want to become snappy or rude during labor.

The whole day was just very calm. I really appreciated that. I can’t imagine having labored all that time at the hospital. It was so nice having the comfort of our own home and the ability to be on our bed, our couch, our floor, our tub, etc. Throughout the day, the contractions gradually picked up in intensity. Several times I found myself laughing (solely on the inside) that the contractions that I could breathe through “easily” were the ones I thought were painful hours earlier.

It didn’t take long until I had to start concentrating on breathing through the contractions or low groaning. I was able to stay very relaxed through them. (Praise #2….usually I respond to pain by tensing up. I was able to just keep my face, hands, legs, and whole body relax and loose all day.)

Early afternoon, I tried the birth ball. I sat on it and rocked gently back and forth. I didn’t like the contractions while sitting but I figured at that point there wouldn’t really be any position where I would “like” the contractions. I was so exhausted that several times I almost fell asleep on the ball and i would catch myself before falling off. The Pilot and my mom were right next to me though just in case. We watched an episode of America’s Got Talent and it was nice to have a distraction if i wanted something to think about during contractions….or tune out of I wanted to….or even pause it while I made it through a contraction.
I tried hands and knees. This caused my only back labor. The Pilot tried applying counter pressure but it didn’t seem to help. On some contractions I liked him rubbing the area that hurt but on others I didn’t want to be touched. We tried various positions, squatting down and supporting myself on the Pilot’s legs, standing and leaning back onto his chest (this was great for several contractions!), etc.

At a few points during the day, I had a couple times where contractions were back to back with no break. It would be strong for 30 seconds, then fade a bit for 30 seconds, then go back to strong.

993358_10201074181911163_1602271484_n

I tried getting in bed again, but they were more intense lying down. I was so tired though that I stayed. I was able to really relax in between contractions and get as close to sleeping as I could come. I didn’t know how much longer I would have to go and I was TIRED. I was so cold in between contractions, but as soon as a contraction came I got very hot and wanted the covers completely off me. Nothing touching me.

I started getting hungry but food didn’t sound good. My Mom offered to make a smoothie. I decided to try laboring in the tub again. While it didn’t soothe the contractions as well as before I really enjoyed the hot water. I drank my smoothie (which came back up later) and just sat, trying to alternate positions a little bit to find a more comfortable way to have the contractions. While in the tub I started to get discouraged. At that point I had been laboring for about 16 hours (although at the time I remember thinking that I didn’t want to count the hours because I didn’t want to know how long it had been). I didn’t know how much longer I had to keep going.

I heard Mom on the phone talking to my sister (Bradley teacher and doula). The Pilot came back in the room and filled me in on what they were thinking. It seemed like I was stalling in labor. They were discussing various options we could try to either slow it down so I could rest or speed it up. We would need to choose. When faced with the decision, for the first time I became scared. I didn’t want to choose to bring it on, because I knew it would only get more intense, but how much more I didn’t know.

Before we had time to make a decision, though, I had a big contraction. I yelled out. I knew that yelling was often a sign of transition, but I tried not to get my hopes up. Later my Mom told me that on the phone my sister said, “Is that Bonnie? I think she’s farther along than you thought!” After another 10 or 15 minutes I had had a few more of those big contractions.

The Pilot and my Mom said they thought it was time to head to the hospital. (Praise #3 – I had been praying that we would have wisdom to know when to go to the hospital. I didn’t want to get there too early or too late. The timing was perfect!) At that point I did not want to move. I didn’t want to stand up out of the tub, I didn’t want to walk. I didn’t want to go. The Pilot helped me get cleaned up and dressed so that I had to move as little as possible.

Finally we got in the car. My Mom and I both sat in the back seat. During the car ride I didn’t have any of the big, yelling out contractions. (Praise #4 – I had been worried about a really terribly uncomfortable car ride to the hospital. It really wasn’t bad.) I sat and moaned through them, some of them back to back again.

This was about 11:30 at night. Since it was after hospital hours, we pulled up at the ER. At the hospital tour they had told us that we wouldn’t get a wheelchair when we arrived so I would need to walk up there. Once again I didn’t even want to move to get out of the car. The Pilot went in and told them we were there and grabbed a wheelchair. I was able to get into it and the Pilot took me inside while Mom parked the car. There were other people there in the ER and I hoped I wouldn’t have loud contractions while there. There was a little girl standing there and I didn’t want to scare her. The Pilot went to go talk to the nurses and I heard him explaining that I was in labor. For some reason, they didn’t come to get me. I think I was in the foyer waiting for at least 10 minutes. At one point, the receptionist came over and saw me and was like, “Oh! You’re in LABOR.” I guess they hadn’t realized that the Pilot meant….right now!! She left and once again I sat.

968860_10201758585232729_1677756740_n

Suddenly my water broke right there in the lobby. (Praise #4 – I didn’t want my water to break early in labor because I didn’t want to be held to the 24 hour rule. And I did not want the doctor to break it. Once again, perfect timing!) I remember thinking I just hoped it wasn’t on the floor. When the Pilot came back I told him my water broke. He looked under the chair and said, “Yes, it did.” I wasn’t embarrassed, but I do remember wondering what all the people behind me in the waiting room were thinking. 🙂 I asked him to check and see if it was clear. It was. (Praise #6 – I had been concerned about meconium being in it. Our hospital doesn’t have a NICU if it had been bad.)

My husband was great the whole time we were there. He let the nurses know a couple of things that were on my birth plan that I had wanted/not wanted so that I didn’t have to worry about talking and taking care of that while in labor.

I quickly figured out from listening to the baby’s heartbeat when a contraction was about to come. In between contractions, they put my Hep lock in and I signed some paperwork. (Praise #5 – I really really do not like needles. I was afraid that the Hep lock would make me so nervous that it would stall labor. It really was the last thing on my mind though and labor definitely did not stall since I was so far along.)

Very quickly every contraction became a yelling contraction. I definitely became a screamer. I tried so hard to concentrate on breathing or moaning, but it always turned into a full blown scream. I hoped that I wasn’t bothering anyone else on the floor who was in labor or recovery. During the contractions, Mom would give leg support and hold my leg up.

I had only been hooked up to the monitor for a short time when the Wingman’s heart rate went low on a contraction. The nurse immediately said that they needed to start an IV. I asked why and she explained about the heart rate. I said I wanted to give it more time. His heart rate never again went that low and I didn’t need the IV at all.

Only a few contractions in and I told her that I felt like I needed to push. Thankfully I was the only person in labor that night, so the nurse was able to stay with me the whole time. She was great. (Praise #6 – in so many things that I have heard, read, and seen, hospital births tend to be chaotic and loud. This was such a calm experience. Everyone stayed calm and quiet and it was great!)

1075753_10201797936616489_693065407_n

Pushing was definitely the hardest part. The Dr still hadn’t arrived (he apparently was in the ER with a patient) and the nurses started getting concerned. One of the nurses called him a couple times to check on where he was. I wasn’t worried. I didn’t care who caught the baby. The Pilot or my Mom could even do it!

I ended up pushing for about an hour. With each contraction, I grabbed tightly onto the hospital bed railings. One time I remember wondering if I was going to break the bed.

I remember asking several times “Why won’t he come out?” Everyone kept reassuring me that he was on his way. I just didn’t know how much longer it would take! Thankfully I was still able to rest in between contractions. At this point I was holding the Pilot’s hand and I remember that during contractions I was squeezing so hard.

Finally, the doctor arrived just as the Wingman was crowning. Somewhere in there I was told he had hair. I was surprised! I think I even mentioned then that I was expecting him to be bald.

Finally I had to push so much I finally figured out how to just close my mouth and push as hard as I could. The ring of fire was not as bad as I expected at all. But it still wasn’t pleasant. He reached that point and then the contraction was over so I stopped pushing. I didn’t want to have to feel that again. But with the next contraction or two, I was able to just keep pushing. I knew that if I could just keep going it would all be over soon. It was several intense seconds to get his head out. Everyone kept telling me he was right there and he was coming…to keep going and I could do this. Finally his head was out and then the rest of his body came out.  It was 1:22 am, July 21st.

After he was born it was kind of a blur. I couldn’t really see him down there but I was just so happy. The first thing I asked was, “Is he still a boy?” The Pilot confirmed and the Dr said, “Did someone tell you it was a girl?” I asked again about his hair and they told me he had a lot of hair. I was smiling and just so happy. I could hear them suctioning him…it sounded like he had a lot of mucus in there. Then I heard him cry. I was so happy to hear him and said something about his sweet cry.

971173_10201074192151419_592132109_n

After about 5 minutes the doctor handed the Wingman to me and then cut the cord. I couldn’t believe it. He was finally there in my arms. I looked at the Pilot and was just so in love with my family. “Can you see him? Isn’t he cute?” I just looked and looked at our little boy. “Thank You, God.” I kept saying that over and over.

After about 15 minutes, they took the Wingman over to the table to weigh and measure him, etc. The Dr asked me to push to try to get the placenta out. I was a little incredulous. “You want me to push again?” But I gave a little push and the placenta immediately came out.

We kept watching to see what his weight was going to be. Finally they weighed him and the Pilot told me he weighed 7 pounds 8 ounces. I was so surprised! (Praise # 7 – This whole pregnancy I was saying how it would be awesome if I could have a baby in the 7 pound range. I really expected him to be bigger, though. God gave me my 7 pound baby!) He also was 20 inches long and his head was 14 in.

When the nurses were done in the room, they just quietly left. They were the greatest nurses. We took turns holding the Wingman and loving him. We just were resting and talking. 2 hours later we took our first family pictures. After that we tried to rest in the room for a little longer.

Praise #8 – I am so thankful that we were able to have a natural birth in the hospital. So many people are skeptical that it can happen. I do think that you have to be more firm yet open to compromise. But it can totally be done. While it isn’t what we first would have preferred, the Pilot and I knew that this is where God wanted us so we knew that the birth would be perfect whatever happened. It sure was. God answered so many prayer requests. We are just so thankful!

All in all it was an incredible birth experience. The day didn’t seem like a 19 hour labor. The contractions were not all “that bad.” I never once reached a point where I wished I had gotten the epidural. It was just an amazing, wonderful experience.  As I said at the beginning, this is only a tiny part of the story too….there are so many other answered prayers.  I am so thankful for how everything went!

I am so thankful for the Pilot and my Mom. I don’t know how I would have done it without them there. The Pilot was so helpful and encouraging the whole time. He is an incredible husband and is already an amazing father!!!

544455_10201111020952116_662468755_n

-Bonnie

Parenting and Motherhood

Leave a comment

Women Living Well is doing a series on the Top 10 Marriage/Motherhood Quotes.  Today I am joining in!

These days it seems like the blog posts on motherhood catch my eye more often.  I wonder why?  😉  Today I share with you 10 blog posts that I have enjoyed while preparing for motherhood.

What Motherhood Is and What It Is Not

Respecting My Children

Raising Children to Know God in the Moments

Teach Children the Bible is Not About Them

“When Mommy Is Sick” School Folder

If Motherhood Isn’t a Competitive Sport, Why Do We Beat Ourselves Up Over It?

12 Things Your Daughter Needs You to Say

After Steubenville: What our Sons Need to Know about Manhood

How to Bless your Young Adult Children

14 Scriptures to Pray Over Your Unborn Baby (and Other Children!)

Visit Women Living Well for more Marriage and Motherhood posts.

-Bonnie

Introducing the Wingman!!

4 Comments

We are so glad to announce the arrival of our precious son!

Our Little Wingman

546826_10201064567350805_1252247753_n

He was born after 19 hours of natural, unmedicated labor.
First family photo…about 2 hours old.

1000496_10201758535551487_314797796_n

Our little cutie!

He is the most perfectly precious baby.  We are absolutely
thrilled that he is here and we are completely in love.
God blessed the labor and delivery so much.  It was
an incredible experience!

A few posts are already scheduled for our blog…but
if there is a lull you will have to excuse us as we
are spending time with our little son.  🙂

Dear Wingman,
All these months and weeks of waiting for you 

were more than worth it.  You are perfectly created in the image
of God.  We can’t wait to see you grow and become a man.
It is still so surreal to know that only a few days ago
you were still inside the womb…and now we
get to see your precious face.  We love you, sweet boy!!
-Daddy and Mommy-