And so I stopped. I stopped thinking. I stopped analyzing. I stopped reading my Bible.
I know that this part of my story especially might be cause for alarm for some people. “The Bible??” you might say. “That is the very thing you NEED. Don’t stop….keep reading!!” And in answer….I honestly have no answer. I cannot explain how much I needed to take a break. I was not turning my back on God. I was not rejecting the Bible. I just couldn’t handle it.
I didn’t like when I read the Bible or people gave me “godly advice.” It felt like a band aid on a severed limb. Or salt on an open wound. I knew it. I knew that Bible passage. I knew the truth.
I loved this post. I was surprised and so very encouraged to know that I wasn’t alone in this.
Perhaps instead of rebuilding another structure of spirituality to replace the one I lost, this is a time for living without the structure. A time for learning to unlearn.
That is what I needed. I needed to unlearn. So I stepped back and hit pause on all of my searching, yearning, and striving. I needed to detox from the Bible that I thought I knew so well. Detox from religion. Detox from the guilt.
In the next few posts I will share a few of the things that really spoke to me.
Part One Part Two Part Three
There’ve been times when I’ve read my Bible daily, but I haven’t read it regularly for a long time. I think you’re right that we can get used to the stories and verses and stop listening to them or learning from them. Or digging deeper to see what else God might be teaching us there. Often, I’ve found music is a great way to hear God’s words to me, because they surprise me and help me see things in a new way. 🙂 (And music is hardly ever legalistic!) 🙂
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